Who foots the bill in the home, the man or woman

Footing the bills is a very important aspect of our home management as Christians. We cannot hide under the guise that we do not have financial misunderstanding in our homes, infact its worse in Christian homes nowadays. A lot of people in Africa (including Christians) traditionally believe that financing a home is solely the function of the man in a home as it was in the beginning particularly in Africa. In the old good days, our forefathers were great farmers, they had enough to eat, sell and even give out without any fear. They had all they needed to get all they wanted. Most of them had many children who helped in farming. The more your children, the more strength and output you get. This was why men married many wives thereby had many children to increase their productivity. Women were not allowed to own much to their names nor even have access to formal education, some did not even have a say in choosing a life partner, and their father married them off. This was a bit of an issue that forced the women to take compulsory refuge under a man even when it against their wish; Women had no say of their own. Unfortunately, Men took advantage of this to maltreat women and made sure they had them as many as possible. Women had no option, they followed their husbands to farm to help out and then cook for them both in the farm and at home. They were never bread winners of their homes, therefore believed that men should provide.
Even the widows were not allowed to stay widowed, they were 're-allocated' to family members of their late husbands in form of re-marrying, except for the older ones who had grownup children who could take care of them. This made women completely subject to men. The men were small gods!

In the contrary, women have their freedom nowadays, a woman of today is civilized and learned. She has broken lose from the shackles of the old, she has her own property, she is educated. She can decide things on her own. Infact, she can do almost without a man. This has given rise to women becoming part of the financier of our today's homes. The phase has changed from women who only support their husbands to women who foot bills now. The women of nowadays make a lot of money, many of them earn even more than their husbands because of their level of education. Some unmarried ladies are doing so well that support the family and a future husband. In some case, women have more chance of getting a new job because women can be more trusted particularly in Africa. There are also some kinds of petty trading most women do which gives some good money in returns but most men will not want to take part in such just because of their natural pride. The women of nowadays have stable income therefore do not wait for the man to make ends meet, she also has a lot to offer. She is financially stable.

This generated the question 'who foots the bills'
 Primarily, the man foots the bills being the head of the home. The man is responsible for providing for his household as African cultural heritage demands. He finds a means for his family at all cost, he works harder every time. This made a lot of women relax and expect the man to provide in any way he can. They don't want to know how he gets it, but they must just provide. Many men go out of their ways in making sure the family do not lack anything, they try to meet up with the expectation of the family at large, meanwhile their wives have means, they earn income but use it for personal projects. They see the home's bill 100% as the man's responsibility. Even when they earn more, they do not see it necessary to take up some financial responsibility for the family. This is what brings us to another important issue. 'JOINT PURSE'. If a family keeps a common purse, then footing of bills will not be a problem. All the family income will be seen as one and it will be easier to get things done. Women should learn to understand particularly in a Christian home that they are help-meets. They are made to help the man. Therefore, should assist the man financially particularly when they have enough. The responsibility of footing bills should be for both of them and not for the man alone in as much as the family is doing fine. The well-being of the family is the priority of both spouses. No one should allow things go wrong just because someone does not have enough. In some cases, the man refuses his responsibility completely forcing the woman to take up the financial role of the man completely, this is not acceptable. Even when a man has no sources of income, he still has a lot of roles to play as the head of the home. Women should not use their own income for self-aid alone when the family has not been taken care off, Likewise men. Both of them needs to join hands and settle the home first before any private need. In summary, women are help-meet and the manager in the home, she should support her husband in footing some bill if she has a means. Footing bills is not the responsibility of a man solely when the woman has a means of income and vice versa, though a lot of men take pride in doing this alone even when they are struggling to achieve it. It should be made straight in a case where the man cannot afford to do it alone, women should be aware that it is their responsibility to support the men.

....If anyone does not provide for his own, and especially his own household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever (1 Timothy 5:8)

Written by
Sunday Onyeemeosi